Last Week

It’s our last week at the apartment. Next Sunday, we will take the cats over to the new place in the morning and get them settled in the basement. Then sometime in the afternoon, the movers will arrive to load up all our stuff and bring them over to the condo. Then we will spend our first night in our new home. And the unpacking and settling process will begin.
This is the longest that I have ever lived in one place. I am thrilled to be moving to our new home and being able to make it our own. Yet in a sense, it’s odd to have made it so long in one place and to now be leaving it. There are a lot of memories wrapped up in this apartment. Including, this was where we lived when 9/11 occurred. This was where I lived when I had my dream job and when I had to leave it. We brought our cats home to this apartment and it’s the only home they really know. I turned 30 and Jono turned 40 while living here. We celebrated both our 5 year and 10 year anniversaries during our time here. The news of my first niece’s birth was received in this apartment.
We will have many new experiences and new memories as we now move to our new home. The next 10 years will bring my 40th and Jono’s 50th birthdays. Our 15 year and 20 year anniversaries. We hope to be able to have people over at the condo for games and fellowship. That is something that we have not been able to really do in our small apartment. We will have our own washer and dryer instead of having to use quarters to do laundry. We can wash our own blankets at home instead of having to go to the laundromat to do it. The future awaits!

Looking Back

As we are packing and going through things getting ready to move to our new house, I have come across old journals from my younger days. One of the journals is from my junior-senior year of college. Reading about the struggles I was facing in those days and seeing the effects of my obsessive-compulsive disorder even in my journaling is a bit sad. Yet it is encouraging also to see how much I have grown and changed since then. How far God has brought me since those days.

Some poetry I wrote back then:
January 1, 1995 – My Lesson
Trust shattered
Vulnerable, left open for pain
Again and
Again and
Again till a brick is laid,
Then another and
another and
Another till a wall is built.
The wall no one can shatter
Trusting no one
No longer vulnerable…
It’s cold behind the wall
Alone
Lonely…

Is it worth it?

January 1, 1995 – My Dilemma
Sliding…
Slowly at first
Then gaining speed…
Grasping, clutching
Something to stop
This downward
Sliding…
Slipping, falling
Unable to reach
Anything to stop
This downward
Sliding…
Going nowhere
Downhill
Fast…
Nothing to stop
This downward
Sliding…
Truth glimmers
A ray of hope…
Gone with yesterday’s dreams
Beyond hope
Beyond reach
I cannot stop
This downward
Sliding…

April 30, 1995 – (Based on Phil. 3:7-ff)
Trash…rot…garbage
Odors wafting over…
Rubbish:
Everything is trash
EXCEPT
Knowing Christ.
Education,
Money,
Power,
Success…
All Trash.
Important?
Only knowing Christ
More
And More
And More…
Goals
Priorities
If everything but
knowing Christ
is Trash,
What’s your purpose,
goal, priority in life?
Is it trash, stinking garbage?

Lessons in Waiting

This past week has been a lesson in waiting and being patient. We had the walk-through of our condo on Tuesday and loved what they did with the renovations – new carpet and vinyl flooring, new appliances and finishing the basement. The hope was to close on Thursday. However, we ran into some snags on Wednesday when the appraiser came back with a value less than the purchase price. So that had to be haggled out, eventually going back to the seller to see if they were willing to lower the selling price. They were, if we gave in to some concessions as well. So, bottom line, our mortgage will be lower, and we will not get some cash back that we were expecting after closing. Overall, in the long term, it will save us money on interest over the 30-year loan of the mortgage. At this point, we still don’t have a closing date, though next week seems to be likely.
The excitement of seeing our new home and then not being able to close right away was difficult for me. I knew that the details would eventually work out, but the waiting was the hard part for me as I was anxious to get into the new place, take pictures and start moving boxes over. But that has been put off a bit longer and I am learning to wait for God’s timing. His plan is always best, even when it doesn’t appear to make sense at the time. He has provided us with a lower mortgage and that is a huge blessing!